Friday, December 20, 2013

"Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard." - Anonymous

Sunday, December 15, 2013

"Do you have the time, to listen to me whine, about nothing and everything all at once?"

Sunday, July 28, 2013

I've decided that I no longer want to have a hierarchy of value between my friendships and my love relationships: they're both crucial, irreplaceable in my life, and fuck anyone who wants me to choose between any of them. Not only that, but I've also stopped classifying things as "love" or "friendship" according to arbitrary superficial details - the feelings I share with certain friends are so intimate, so beautiful, that it's ridiculous that I don't call them lovers just because we don't sleep together. It's fucking absurd that sex should be the dividing line between our relationships, between which ones take precedence, between who we play with, live with, sleep with, who we take care of first, and who we die with at last.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

It's kind of sad how "holiday gain" happens every month of the year to me...
Am I the only one who finds this hilarious though?

Cooking fail #39

November 2011. 
Foam Party, Roma House. 
Lusaka, Zambia.

"Force attracts men of low morality." - Albert Einstein

The World As I See It

"How strange is the lot of us mortals! Each of us is here for a brief sojourn; for what purpose he knows not, though he sometimes thinks he senses it. But without deeper reflection one knows from daily life that one exists for other people -- first of all for those upon whose smiles and well-being our own happiness is wholly dependent, and then for the many, unknown to us, to whose destinies we are bound by the ties of sympathy. A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving...

"I have never looked upon ease and happiness as ends in themselves -- this critical basis I call the ideal of a pigsty. The ideals that have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been Kindness, Beauty, and Truth. Without the sense of kinship with men of like mind, without the occupation with the objective world, the eternally unattainable in the field of art and scientific endeavors, life would have seemed empty to me. The trite objects of human efforts -- possessions, outward success, luxury -- have always seemed to me contemptible.

"My passionate sense of social justice and social responsibility has always contrasted oddly with my pronounced lack of need for direct contact with other human beings and human communities. I am truly a 'lone traveler' and have never belonged to my country, my home, my friends, or even my immediate family, with my whole heart; in the face of all these ties, I have never lost a sense of distance and a need for solitude..."

"My political ideal is democracy. Let every man be respected as an individual and no man idolized. It is an irony of fate that I myself have been the recipient of excessive admiration and reverence from my fellow-beings, through no fault, and no merit, of my own. The cause of this may well be the desire, unattainable for many, to understand the few ideas to which I have with my feeble powers attained through ceaseless struggle. I am quite aware that for any organization to reach its goals, one man must do the thinking and directing and generally bear the responsibility. But the led must not be coerced, they must be able to choose their leader. In my opinion, an autocratic system of coercion soon degenerates; force attracts men of low morality... The really valuable thing in the pageant of human life seems to me not the political state, but the creative, sentient individual, the personality; it alone creates the noble and the sublime, while the herd as such remains dull in thought and dull in feeling.

"This topic brings me to that worst outcrop of herd life, the military system, which I abhor... This plague-spot of civilization ought to be abolished with all possible speed. Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism -- how passionately I hate them!

"The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion that stands at the cradle of true art and true science. Whoever does not know it and can no longer wonder, no longer marvel, is as good as dead, and his eyes are dimmed. It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion. A knowledge of the existence of something we cannot penetrate, our perceptions of the profoundest reason and the most radiant beauty, which only in their most primitive forms are accessible to our minds: it is this knowledge and this emotion that constitute true religiosity. In this sense, and only this sense, I am a deeply religious man... I am satisfied with the mystery of life's eternity and with a knowledge, a sense, of the marvelous structure of existence -- as well as the humble attempt to understand even a tiny portion of the Reason that manifests itself in nature."

An essay by Albert Einstein

Monday, May 20, 2013

All of us in the punk rock family have to endure lives like these. But, frankly, isn't it worth it? Question the establishment; demand your rights. You have every right to do so, because to live and not to breathe is to die in tragedy.

"You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain." -

Sunday, May 19, 2013

"The tragedy of life is not death but what we let die inside of us while we live." -Norman Cousins
Child laborers in the United States, late 1800s.

Benito Musolini's headquarters.

An actual Titanic boarding pass.

Friday, May 17, 2013

I think Edgar Allan Poe and Billie Joe Armstrong and Happy Bunny and Sarcastic E-Cards and Salvador Dali and Noam Chomsky and Michael Crichton and Dee Dee Ramone and Gordon Ramsay and Lisbeth Salander should all somehow fuse together and then this resulting hybrid will be my soulmate. 
"I'm bored" is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you've seen none percent of. And even the inside of your own mind is endless. It goes on forever inwardly. Do you understand? Being the fact that you're alive is amazing, so you don't get to be bored.

Monday, April 29, 2013

Trying not to let my adjusted-to-Canadian-weather body melt in sunny CancĂșn, I find myself following these handy tips to maintaining beauty in the salty-aired tropics! You're welcome ;)

Tip#1: If you have oily or combination skin, like I do, the moment you land in the tropics you will feel your pores getting clogged. Suffer from breaking out? Take a few drops of tea tree oil (I use 100% pure) and massage it into the area after washing with a neutral face wash. It works like pure freaking magic! Pimples be gone overnight :) Works great on acne too! If you have particularly stubborn skin, put a couple of drops of the oil in your face wash and body wash too. Here's the deal - tea tree oil is an antibacterial agent - a natural one, unlike triclosan, which is found in soaps. Pimples are mainly bacteria mixed with oil trapped inside pores. Au natural cure in a bottle, tea tree oil is.
PS: The Body Shop, even though I adore it, has a really horrendous selection of tea tree oil products (with the exception of the face wash). I would buy it straight from a pharmacy - that way you also know it is pure.

Tip#2: Just because it is humid does not mean your skin does not need some moisturizing care. And no, I do not mean slather on a mother-load of lotion all day. What you can do once a week is massage yourself thoroughly with EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL. Massage yourself as if your life depends on it - your entire body. Let that redness of skin show. Then chill for a bit, maybe half an hour or more. After that, take a small towel and soak it in boiling water. Hold it against your skin and let the heat permeate your pores. After a minute, wipe the oil off your skin, rinse the towel, and repeat process. Do this for your whole body. And once you are completely clean of oil, DO NOT TAKE A SHOWER OR USE SOAP OR ANY PRODUCT ON YOUR SKIN. Just go to bed, and shower the next day :) Trust me, your skin quality will drastically improve. Do not do this too often though, or it will dry out your skin (your skin realizes it is getting so much oil that it will stop producing its own). Once a week or 10 days or so is sufficient. 

Tip#3: To rid your skin of uneven skin tones, wash your face and then apply lemon juice all over it. Once it dries, massage in some plain yogurt. Wait for the yogurt to dry completely, and then rinse off, massaging your skin the whole time while rinsing. Result: voila, clear and soft skin!

Tip#4: Feeling sweaty all day? Spray some water on your skin. It's pure, it's hydrating, it's cheap, it's easy!

Good luck - buena suerte :)
I really ought to consider myself fortunate for being able to unload everything in my mind after SUCH a long time… but the jet-lagged, sleep-deprived, hungry, and disoriented whatsherface9 is far from humble. So I consider my readers lucky to be able to read my thoughts after such a long time ;) 

So what in tarnation am I going to complain about today? Perhaps the reactions to my existence. To be honest, I never have any filters, so here is the pure harsh truth that I mentally dissect a billion times every day.

I am an international student. And by international, I don't mean that I am the daughter of some rich businessman who decided to study abroad. My parents are upper-middle-class diplomats who just barely finished bachelor's degrees and passed exams to enter into the world of international civil services. My parents grew up as one of five siblings in homes with annual incomes of less than $3000. My parents are the epitome of hard work. Yes, there are times when I take my current present for granted. Forget where my parents started, and what they do to ensure that I have a college education. But there are other times when  people try to fit me into the stereotype of international student. And those are times when I realize that I can never forget my roots.

Stereotype number 1: All international students are rich and spoiled.

THIS IS A LIE. Yes, I have gone to international schools my whole life. Yes, I do travel the world. Do we pay for any of it? NO. My parents work for embassies and NGOs! Everybody who is associated with an embassy or NGO knows that these organizations and governments are required to pay for international schools and flight tickets to back home. Embassies do NOT pay for university education. And this is why I absolutely hate it when people think I am at the university I am at because my parents paid for it. Nobody stops to think that because my parents cannot pay so many thousands of dollars per year for me to get a college education, I maybe worked my behind off my entire life to get the best grades at my school. Maybe I am only there because of scholarships? No, this does not occur to anyone. Just because I have had the opportunity to experience life from a variety of perspectives does not mean I am this highly paid exotic specimen who is one step away from being royal family at an outlandish nation (or nations). I am just someone whose whole purpose in life is not to sit at a coffee shop with tumblr and twitter open on their iPads, dressed all pretty, with a mask of makeup caked onto what they call their faces. My whole purpose in life is to follow in the footsteps of my parents and climb that ladder even higher.

Stereotype number 2: Just because somebody lived in another country, they are an international student.

Hahahahahaha. The definition of an international student, in my opinion, is someone who has lived in MULTIPLE countries throughout their CHILDHOOD and ADOLESCENCE. Just because you are from country A and have lived in country B your whole life does not make you an international student - especially if country B and A are extremely similar in culture. You have not experienced life from a variety of perspectives - you have just looked from opposite ends of the same telescope. Throw in some more narrow-mindedness into that combination and you have become a walking time-bomb that counts down to the point in time when I will explode. Are you able to understand that just because someone is casual about sex is not a slut? Are you able to understand that the offspring of a black parent and a white parent will not be black, but mixed race? Are you ready to accept that through time there will be a multitude of people who do not take religion or belief seriously, who preach atheism, who are intolerant of others' ideas? Can you handle that? Can you get to know the persona beneath these superficial facades that scare away most people? If you cannot, then I do not consider you an international student. And don't you dare tell people that you are from so many different countries. You are from one and have lived in another. Case closed. Oh, and on a side note, if somebody at a university asks you, "are you domestic or international," and you are a permanent resident.. please say you are "domestic." Do not make any excuses. Do not say "I am a permanent resident but I am kind of international." Do you know anything about visa processes, student visas, multiple citizenship, international tuition fees, international money transfer, or any of the aspects of international student life? Do you even know what international postal services like FedEx and DHL are? No. 't not try to be one if you are not one. And who in hell doesn't know what FedEx is!?!? And you try to be international.

Stereotype number 3: International students are weirdos.

Oh really? Burn me at the stake for being too cocky, but I am one of the many people whose mere existence can convince others of what it is like to be educated in various manners. I speak a variety of languages, eat a variety of foods, call many places homes. Does that make me a weirdo? No. It makes you a narrow-minded imbecile. Accept it.

I am proud to be international. I will always be truly and completely international, no matter what. To those who cannot accept it, wallow in the knowledge that I have lived life to a deeper and more enriching extent than any of you have. And to those who cannot accept the fact that they are domestic, yes you can try to live life from a variety of perspectives. But that is your future and not your past. Do not try to twist words to turn your past into something that it was not. It is your tomorrow and not your yesterday that matters. They are interchangeable, identical. Your tomorrow defines your yesterday. Perhaps that is why, in Hindi, tomorrow and yesterday are symbolized by the same word: kal. 

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Here's some love before I die in my bed for tonight (today?). It's grapefruit, I think, which is ironic since grapefruit juice is all I've been drinking since this flu virus has started its devilry in my body. Urghhh I will overcome this mutant-evil.... But how are grapefruit lips love? Oh yeah, MWAHHHHH. One of the rare displays of affection you'll ever get from me.

I really ought to go to bed now, but this blog just tempts me. It's probably not a good idea to vent out all my problems here because it is public, but to be honest, who in tarnation cares? If you don't agree with what I have to say, well, it's my f*cking life, and you know what? Nobody invited you. So there's the door - see ya! Yup, I stole that quote from the charming Billie Joe Armstrong.
But why am I still here? Oh yeah, because that douche-commercial is still on my mind. That wannabe who I considered a close friend but is now more two-faced than the pennies that are now extinct in Canada. So I decided to stalk said douche-commercial's tumblr for more evidence to feed the fire of hate burning in my gut. I found all sorts of photos. And I hate to admit it, but I liked a lot of them a lot. However, do they describe douche-commercial's personality? No. The personality douche-commercial would like to be? Yes. 
But surprise, surprise.. It's funny, but on that tumblr page I saw more of myself than I'd liked to have seen. Or is it the personality that I would like to become as well? Do douche-commercial and I have more in common than I'd like to admit?There was one photo that particularly caught my attention. I, to be completeelyyy frank kind of sort of fell in love with it. But the part of my mind that condemns douche-commercial and anything to do with douche-commercial completely justified the fact that the photo, like the rest of douche-commercial, is pure trash (oxymoron). I found THIS photo:

Strange huh? It's kind of classy and sexy and attractive and feminine. But at the same time, who in hell wants that? I say walk like you own the world, like you're Satan himself in the world that is Hell. Don't dispose yourself to the men that will use you like tissue and then toss you away. But simultaneously... isn't a little more sex appeal what we all need? And isn't the sight of a guy checking you out enough to make your cheeks rosier and your damn day brighter?Food for thought ;) for me or for you? Like I said, who in tarnation knows or cares.

It's funny how I ever started blogging. I've been meaning to do it for so long. It's funny how I manage to do 50 million other pointless things before getting round to doing what I'm meant to do. I wasted $20 on a diary because I really felt the need to share myself with something or someone that does not know me at all. An unbiased third party. But the process of writing a diary... ugly handwriting, and smudged ink, and creased pages.. just no. So I've finally achieved the goal I've always wanted to - to create a blog. Maybe it's the spark that will ignite a chain of events that will lead me to succeeding all my goals? Maybe I will start studying again and getting the amazing grades I used to? Who knows. Perhaps the process of blogging will become an eye-opener? Will this lead me to knowing myself better? Aren't eyes supposedly windows to the soul? Which makes no sense because eyes look out, not in. Nobody knows. This blog will tell.